I’ve realized something: I become less disciplined when I don’t blog. The month of April, which has definitely been light on blogging, has not been my best month. I have managed to maintain my weight, but after losing 5 pounds in March, that’s pretty pitiful. I haven’t exercised much, and I don’t even know exactly how much because I’ve slacked off on tracking my fitness minutes. I opted to skip exercise many days, and even though I’ve still been tracking my calories, they haven’t been good calories on many days. All of this was made easier by my infrequent blog posts. Sad, huh?

I also think part of the problem is that I feel like I am floundering a bit now that I don’t have the goal of running a half marathon staring me in the face. I definitely feel like it was the right decision for me not to run it, and I don’t regret that, but I do miss having a goal like that to focus on. It gave my workouts purpose and direction, and now I’m lacking that, which has made it far too easy to skip them altogether. Ultimately, though, I’m just making excuses, and the truth is I haven’t wanted to lose weight enough this month to actually put in the effort to make weight loss possible. It literally just occurred to me that even though I don’t have the big goal of completing a half marathon, I still have 10 pounds to lose to reach my big goal of losing 100 pounds. Why can’t THAT be enough to give me focus??

Honestly, some days I think I’d be fine staying at the weight that I am. I am happy with how I look in (most) clothes, and I feel more confident than I have in YEARS. But then I see all the extra skin and fatty parts of my body and know that I am not being as good to my body as I need to be. I am not feeding it what it needs or giving it the workouts it deserves, and so even though I may be content with my weight, I am not content with my lifestyle, so something needs to change.

That being said, I am going to jump back on the 30 Day Shred bandwagon! I first tried it back in October of 2008 but then had to quit because it was too rough on my knees. However, I am ready to try again and see what I’ve got. I’m very excited to see if I find it easier than it was for me back then, when I was about 47 pounds heavier. I know it will be challenging, but I am hopeful that all the running I’ve been doing has put me in better shape. The plan is to do the Shred 3 days a week, and I want to be able to do all 3 levels by the end of the summer. I think that’s a very doable goal, and I’m hoping it will help me tone those places that are in desperate need of it! Even better, my husband has agreed to try it with me, so tomorrow morning is our first workout! I can’t wait!

I hope you all are doing wonderfully and are doing your best to make your goals happen, even I’m not the same! 🙂