I’m 21 weeks along now. Woohoo! I feel like I still have a long way to go, though, and I guess I do. I imagine the last few months will fly by, however, and we certainly have plenty to do to get ready for Charlotte’s arrival: select bedding; decorate (and possibly paint) the nursery; get all the furniture; buy tons and tons of diapers and all the other needed supplies; finalize daycare plans; and select a pediatrician. Whew! That’s quite a list, and I’m sure that’s not even everything.
Sometimes I get a little overwhelmed when I think about the fact that in 19 weeks or so we’ll have an actual baby to bring home. I wonder if I will be a good mom and if I will know what to do when she cries. I worry about going back to work and how I’ll balance being a Christian, a wife, a mom, and an employee with only 24 hours in a day. I even worry that she’ll inherit all of my worst traits: my procrastination; my tendency toward pessimism; my insecurity; my obsession with food and weight, etc..
But you know what? All of those worries do nothing but leave me fearful and exhausted, and that’s a far cry from the abundant life Jesus wants me to experience. I have been reading Romans 8 this week, and when I am find myself fretting and laden with guilt, I remember verses 1 and 2:
“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death.”
And when I feel so overwhelmed I don’t even know how to pray, I remember verses 26-27:
“Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.”
And then come my favorite verses:
“Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? As it is written, “For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
The love of the Father for me is so great, how can I let myself be swallowed up by fear?
Today I choose to rest in His love. Won’t you do the same?