Philippians 4:12: I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.
I’ve been doing something radical recently: I’ve been reading my Bible. I know, I know, it’s a novel idea, isn’t it? I don’t think it’s any secret that my first semester in grad school was hard, and I doubt it would surprise any of you further to know that I wanted to quit. I was completely dissatisfied with my life, and I wanted something more, something better, something different.
Now that I’ve had the chance to reflect on the events of the past few months, I’ve wondered if a lot of my dissatisfaction with the semester is due mainly to my misplaced priorities. Truth be told, God took the backburner in my life. In typical, sinful fashion, the more I felt overwhelmed about grad school or life in general, the more I retreated into self-pity and away from the truths of Scripture. No wonder I was miserable! No wonder I cried myself to sleep on more than one occasion, wondering when I would feel joy again. No wonder I questioned the very meaning of my existence. I cut myself off from the Lifeline, and so I felt like dying.
Yet because of His great mercies I was not consumed, but instead upon reaching the bottom of the pit, I found Him there to lift me out. Did I deserve it? No. Am I grateful? Every day.
I haven’t even gotten to my keywords yet, but I think I’m going to stop here. I have learned several important lessons in the last few weeks, and I don’t know that I would have learned them so well had I not reached the end of myself. And really, where else is Jesus to be found but where we’ve reached the end of ourselves?
Stay tuned for more.